Judging Yourself

Think about it. Who are you really judging?

The best advice I can give for people who criticize themselves without mercy, is what I do for myself. I have a mantra I use:

 "I'm doing the best I can with the awareness I have at this time." 

This is where I remind myself it is OK not to be perfect.  After all nobody is.  All I can do is the best I can at any certain point in time. If I'm doing the best with my current awareness, that's good enough. 

Tomorrow I will have a new awareness and six months from now I will have a new awareness. Perhaps I will be doing better then.

I also learned that when I criticize others, I am rehearsing to criticize myself. Think about it. The brain cannot differentiate between itself and others.

 If you think bad thoughts about others or put other people down to make yourself feel better, your brain only knows the behavior. After all, if you criticize others, doesn't that mean you have to maintain a higher standard to be better than them?  How is that working for you?

I got one of those plastic bracelets and put it on my wrist (a rubber band will do). Each time I found myself criticizing others verbally or mentally (she's fat) I switched the bracelet. I also did this when I criticized myself. 

This gave me heightened awareness and after a few days I didn't have to switch it so many times. I might add awareness is key. I also prayed to my higher power to give me the awareness not to think badly of others or myself.

OK, time for a test. Think about a person whom you do not like, be it a friend or national figure. Now think this about them.  He/She is doing the best he/she can with the awareness they have at this time! Is it true? Of course it is. 

Is it possible at some time they might have a different awareness at act differently at that time? Is it true their awareness is fashioned by their upbringing and possible criticisms they received in life? So now can you blame them?

It doesn't mean you have to like them, but maybe you can understand them better, given your own situation. After all, we are all on this planet together.

We are all interconnected with the same God or source or higher power. This source does not want us to hate others or hate ourselves. Our higher power wants us to love ourselves and we can't do that if we hate others as I explained earlier.

Hope this works for you. Take what you need and leave the rest.

Don W.